Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
