i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
