just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
