i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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