This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
