Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
