Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
