Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
