He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
