..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
