No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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