): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
