That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
As shirtless as possible
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Randomize
