You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
