I think I won the penis lottery.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
