U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
