Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
