She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
