I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
