That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize