i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
