its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
It's not a walk of shame if you run
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
