You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
