writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
