The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
