He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Randomize
