You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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