i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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