Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize