"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
