Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
