Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
