Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
