singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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