More tranny stories later!
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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