I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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