spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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