Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
