Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
