That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
