After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
