yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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