i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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