This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
