What a fucking waste of an outfit
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize