BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
