a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
