Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
