Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Randomize
