clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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